to make me ME...

In the December issue of Real Simple, ladies submitted their New Years resolutions. One said she wouldn't do anything different, because it is her flaws that make her who she is.

I do not want my life to ever be defined by my flaws, by the negative, by my mistakes and regrets. I am only 26 and to give up on myself would be... sad. I mean there is something to be said about accepting yourself for who you are, but I don't know if I will ever give up challenging myself to grow.

To Move Forward
I was given this exercise and thought it was more thought provoking that simply making new year's resolutions. It involves a 6 step process (it is much easier than it sounds).

Step 1
List your accomplishments- big and small
* I had a hard time with this step. My list is tiny, just 5 things.*
-cleaned out our storage unit and saved $120 a month for the whole year!
-let go of "skinny clothes" and broken things from the move(s)
-made my Rigby healthy
-bought MichMansion
-donated 13 inches of my hair

Step 2
List what gave you pleasure this year
*the fun part*
-twins (on my list 4 different times)
-coloring books
-Mom
-Dad
-Rigby purring
-Geochaching
-short hair
-taking pictures
-Abbey's pretty eyes and sweet cuddles
-vacation to the Hill Country
-tubing
-Christi
-Rob and Melissa (especially Mel)
-shark train!!
-a clean house
-Mexican Friday
-Grammy's chocolate ice cream
-my new Christmas tree
-working lights in my bathroom
-cardinal family in MY backyard
-blogging

Step 3
List disappointments, unfulfilled expectations, thwarted intentions, sources of displeasure
-not knowing where I am going in life
-the house buying process
-home repair decisions
-traffic
-getting sick & hurt and using all my PTO
-not seeing Christi more often
-not calling Jeni every week
-my cooking "skills"
-did not get promotion
-gained back all the weight I lost in '08
-stress
-unfinished projects around MichMansion
-bored with work and life

Step 4
Who do I need to forgive and for what
*I'll keep these private*

Step 5
Who do I need to thank and for what
-my parents are awesome friends to David and me. I love spending every Friday night with them and most weekends. They take care of us, and give us wisdom and help in every way possible. This year has been the best year with them, getting to know them and I have enjoyed them more than I can say.
-I have wonderful friends, who I am not always as good of a friend to. I am horrible about making plans and calling. But they are always there for me when I need them, can always make me laugh, make me feel better about myself and my life.
-David. He is a hard worker. I give him a hard time sometimes, but he does alot for our family. He runs errands, makes calls and takes care of my sweet kitties.

Step 6
Any last thoughts about 2009
-this was a big, stressful year for me and David. I really believe 2010 is going to be a smoother, less stressful year. And I really want to spring clean my life. I want to start new this year. Too long have I been struggling, it is time for renewal.

And there you have it, the abridged version. Some thoughts for the New Year...