Christmas Reboot

Well everything did turn out alright. I was so stressed out and just couldn't see how everything was going to get done. *Note to self - stop worrying, everything will be ok.

Bivins Christmas - December 27

Leah & Michael made it into town and Mommy pulled off a Christmas dinner while she was at work. And we did our fun present time together. B&D are so grown up and they were super excited about presents. Having kids around at Christmas makes everything exciting.

Andy's Birthday/Micheletti Christmas - December 28

For some reason I decided to do a mini birthday party for Andy and cook Christmas dinner all on a day I worked, in the middle of our quarter/year end close. Hence the freakouts.

Friday morning it was misty and cloudy and gross, and I didn't think the weather would hold up to ride the Hermann park train. But some how, the sun came out and it was nice a mild so we decided to go. When we got on the train the wind started to blow, and half way through the ride it was frigid air blowing on us. Funny thing about kids... when on a train nothing else matters. Andy had fun so that was a success. I didn't manage to get balloons or cupcake with a candle, but luckily it was so cold we just ran to the cars and went home.

DP and I went back to the house where the chicken was already in the oven. I made Chicken Supreme, rice, roasted broccoli, a salad with creamy balsamic vinaigrette, peas and rolls. We tried to have prosciutto wrapped pears but I tried a bite and spit it out. Terrible. I'm thinking the prosciutto was just bad because we tried to use it again on Saturday and it was just foul tasting.

We had worked days cleaning the house and getting the house looking acceptable for guests. When I know people are coming over all I can see is Michmansion's faults but it never fails that guests never see the cracks in the sheet rock and the wonky tile. It shows well.

It was kind of a perfect night. Everything was sparkly, all the things I worried about went smoothly, and Christmas was deemed special! After dinner and chatting, and a short nap for Gil, we went back to their house so Mary could be readied for bed. Then we did presents and had David's pumpkin pie & wassail. (David made his pie without any measuring spoons or cups, just a plastic spoon. Amazingly it tasted good!!)

Bivins/Micheletti/Bivins Day - December 29

Dp and I woke up early and brought Shipleys down to my parents. Then with the boys pumped full of sugar David continued to play light saber monster tackle. Me and Mom looked through old Christmas pictures.

It had not been easy to put MeeMaw out of my mind this holiday. I had planned something fun for her birthday but David and I were sick. (I'm thinking about doing it in January instead) Seeing pictures of memories made me miss her terribly.

We ate lunch with David's family and his cousins/Aunt who came down from Dallas for the day. And then we took showers and headed back down to my parents for our big Bivins Christmas. Lots of kids, lots of noise, lots of food. I know how important it is keep family traditions going. Even if it is one day a year, we have to keep the family together. I realise how much I haven't been careful to maintain relationships. I need to make it a priority.

Micheletti Sunday - December 30

How did I convince everyone to have breakfast at El Tiempo? Not sure, I am deviously manipulative. And it was delicious. Delish. Then we all went back to his parents house to let the kids play and let the boys play Ipad Risk.

After we dropped everyone off at the airport David and I went home and collapsed.

Christmas was over.

attitude adjustment

When you were a grumpy kid being sassy and pouty, did your mom tell say "You need an attitude adjustment" ? My mom used to say that all the time.  In fact we weren't allowed to watch Beverly Hills Teens (which was like Jem + Archie in an 80's cartoon) cause the kids were too sassy.

Mom hasn't told me I need an attitude adjustment in years, but I need one.

I get so overwhelmed trying to impress David's family. I just want them to like me and I never feel like I've made it into the fold. I over compensate by over planning and trying to make Christmas "special" because I know it is Gill's favorite holiday. I plan elaborate meals, outings, devotionals, activities - anything to get positive attention. In the end I become grumpy and pouty because I'm worn out and didn't enjoy the holiday because I'm too worried about the Special Factor.

Yesterday David informed me that his cousins are coming to Houston for a couple days.
I freaked out. How are we going to adjust our plans and where will everyone go and how will we feed them and I don't have any activities planned for kids and and and.

I emailed my mom venting how I don't know how I am going to deal with added complexity of more people. 
She responded:
"His cousins are so good to make the effort to come down."

Mommy, in the nicest way possible, told me I need an attitude adjustment. Of course I didn't see it that way. Here I am using a holiday to try and earn brownie points with in-laws when I'm missing the whole point. I'm Martha.

³⁸ As Jesus and his disciples were on their way, he came to a village where a woman named Martha opened her home to him. ³⁹ She had a sister called Mary, who sat at the Lord’s feet listening to what he said. ⁴⁰ But Martha was distracted by all the preparations that had to be made. She came to him and asked, “Lord, don’t you care that my sister has left me to do the work by myself? Tell her to help me!”
⁴¹ “Martha, Martha,” the Lord answered, “you are worried and upset about many things, ⁴² but few things are needed—or indeed only one. Mary has chosen what is better, and it will not be taken away from her.”
Luke 10:38-42


But it is so easy to defend Martha.
Martha is a doer, she knows that if she isn't in the kitchen dinner isn't going to get cooked. I guess I still haven't fully grasped the "what is really important" lesson.

Even typing this, knowing that I've totally messed up and need to change my perspective I'm still sweating (literally) cause the pie isn't done and it is too rainy to pull of the birthday party I planned for Andy and after days of Dp sanding the bathroom door still won't close...

Stress-ember

December has become one of my least favorite months.

It is plump with too many activities, too many projects, too many expectations, too much stuff.

I just want a simple December.

Simple days, simple nights

And I fear I am past the age of simple.

December 3rd

Mom and I started the month of right by taking a day off of work. The alarm went off at work because my butt wasn't in my chair, but I didn't care. I didn't check emails, I didn't even worry that it was the first day of our quarter close rush.

We were going shopping for Christmas presents (which turned into us just going shopping and me not buying a single thing). I love hanging out with my mom. We had lunch at Grand Lux and had my mom home before rush hour traffic.

December 8th

Dp and I went for a hike (but you can't really call it that when there isn't any toporgaphy, so it was just a walk) at Brazos Bend.  I always have this vision of what a walk in the woods will be like and then - never fails - Boy Scouts, loud and roudy, come wizzing past us on bikes. This troup also got a speech about how you dont throw rocks at horses...

December 9th

I was "starting" to stress out that nothing is done yet, no presents, no Christmas plans, no decorations. So I forced Dp to help me get all the little Christmas goodies out. He gives me such a hard time about the excess of decorations. I have 1 tub. And I always think I have more nutcrackers than I really do.

December 10th- 22nd

I went into quarter close hibernation. My work load explodes at the end of the year just as everyone else slows down. Never enough hours in the day, lots of late nights.

Somehow we got our shopping done, in one strategically planned Saturday outing. Home before noon.

Dp gets a cold, Dp gives Analee a cold.

December 23rd

Christi, me and her brother Shane have seen every single Lord of the Rings movie together. So me and my phlem, saw the Hobbit together. It isn't really Christmas without LOTR. Of course David and Christi sat together as Tolkien fans.

December 24th

Such a weird Christmas this year. We haven't really done any of our Christmases yet. David went shopping with his dad... on Christmas Eve... in two of the most crowded places in Houston. Those Michelettis are crazy. Christmas Eve we went over to my parents house. Mommy mad chicken nuggets and mashed potatoes and we tried to remember our earliest Christmas memory. Then we went home and watched Treasure Quest on Netflicks. Very Christmasy.

December 25th

Dp and I woke up, opened presents. And then we went to take Gil & Mary to the Omni West for Christmas Brunch. Nope didn't cook, didn't attempt to cook. Huge spread at that place, and I forced Dp to eat a little green salad. Then we came home, took a decadent nap, watched Treasure Quest and ate a frozen pizza. And then I stayed up till 1am working on work.

December 26th

Back at work.

14 before '14

When I turned 10 years old my dad sat me on the couch and asked me how it felt to be a decade old and what have I learned in a decade. So when I turned 20 I thought of that day, little baby Analee sitting on the couch with legs swinging back and forth. Ten years is a long time.

Have you heard of the 30 before 30? A bucket list of experiences to complete before you turn 30, a "last hurrah".  The number 30 doesn't bother me, but another decade has gone by and looking back at 20 year old Analee seems just as far away as 10 year old Analee.

A birthday is a great opportunity to reevaluate the years past. What did 20 year old Analee want to do that she never did, and maybe she made some mistakes that can be cleaned up. Well I realized that I don't have a whole year to do 30 things before my 30th birthday... I have 6 months. Out of nowhere 29.5 snuck up on me.

Below is my 14 before 2014 list - part bucket list, part new years resolutions, part Analee cleaning house list.  I've been in hibernation mode for most of my 20s and it is time for me to start living, growing and doing things. (mom - sorry about #7) What an opportunity to put a deadline on a few dreams, and light a fire under my butt to fix things I need to fix.

I'm giving myself one year to complete these 14 tasks. I am going to ask for help, I am going to be patient and kind to myself and I'm going to the Rose Bowl Parade!

Morning

Mornings stress me out.

I have the "i dont wanna go" fight with myself; then start my stressful list making in the shower; then comes the guilt from what I didn't do last night, what I ate last night, how messy the house is; full loop back to the "i dont wanna go" except this time its starting to sound like a great idea to stay home.

The following are half thoughts too small to write an entire post, but blog worthy nevertheless.

:: Last night I went to check on Wheels before bed and when I peaked out the window there was a dingo on the porch eating her food!!! (small possibility it was a dog) Insert chasing dog away story here. I kept watching the front yard for dingo's return when I saw him come loafing down the street, WAIT that's a giant possum! Ewwwwy. *ps Wheels was fine.

:: My rich, pulled together alter ego is so great. She has a clean and decorated house, wears cute clothes, doesn't sweat, and wraps her Christmas gifts with Container Store wrapping paper.
Seriously the most beautiful wrapping paper on the planet. And I want all of it.

:: This year I have painted my nails more than any other time in my life. Something about a 99cent bottle of nail polish makes me feel good. And when I can't afford new clothes or gifts for friends - nail polish works every time.

:: Rigby normally hates the blow dryer but this morning he was so cozy on "his" heated blanket, he just opened one eye and watched me, didn't even lift his head.

So now that I have avoided getting dressed so long that it is past leaving time.... but i dont wanna....

thanksgiving on mars

Mommy cooked and cooked and cooked. And I ate and ate and ate. The whole break I took an unhealthy amount of naps after eating unhealthy amounts of ham, it was GLORIOUS.

David and I went out Black Friday to look for lights but didn't find anything. I'm a little worried because I've had very bad xmas crafting luck and it is still November. I'm not going to lie, I already have a giant knot in my stomach because of Christmas planning, I wish it was still easy. However, Dp did get my outside lights up over the weekend (Wheels helped - she is such a sweetie). I don't know what it is this year but nothing looks right. Meh. I need an explosion of lights this year.

If you are a 5 year old boy you might ask Santa for a David for Christmas.

Those kids love, I mean loooooooove David. They want to play with him non-stop when we visit. It is kinda a fair fight, 2 of them against 1 giant.

I've been wondering if they are old enough now to file these holidays into long term memory. Will they remember how they liked to snuggle after nap?  Or that I would watch movies with them and watch them play Angry Birds (shockingly well)?

Games Hot with the childrens:

:: Wrestling is still hot (this is when I can play Rescue From Monster)

:: Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle the board game (don't throw anything out, this go fish knock off is from circa 1989)

:: Space Invaders - does your Swing Set Space Ship frequently crash on Mars? The Moon? Or Planet Shundelcloon? Then you too can play space invaders!

Next Thanksgiving they will be Kindergartners! And will have a baby sister!  And maybe Grandaddy will have been called home.

Life keeps changing. 

I can't wait for next year to see the boys grow and play with Sweet Monkey, yet at the same time want everything to stay the same. Ecclesiastes 3 says there is a time for everything, but really it should say that everything happens at once. Somehow we are meant to be joyful in the midst of bills, mourning, stress, and frustrations. What a gift! To be able to put our sadness away for moments and enjoy life.

3:13 That each of them may eat and drink, and find satisfaction in all their toil—this is the gift of God.

sugar and spice

Having a sister maybe the best ever.

It was like having a best friend from birth. Someone to play with, sing and dance with, race, fight, share a bed, and teach me SO much. Being the little sister takes the cake.

When the boys were born I fell in love. It was like they were mine in a special way. I saw my sister in these two crazy boys. Sometimes even seeing myself in them. Brody and Dylan have always been pure joy, just giggles and smiles. Being an auntie is almost better than being a little sister.

Watching Leah & Michael yearn for another child was hard. I wanted a baby for her so badly. When she told me they were expecting - it was pure joy again! Thrilled doesn't describe the joy, I was so so so so happy and thankful. And imagine my squeals when we found out I have a NIECE !!!

I'm so excited to have a niece but also for the boys to have a sister, and Michael to have a daughter, and my sweet sister to have everything her heart wished for. Nothing makes me quite as thankful this Thanksgiving than little Sweet Monkey.

And I've already started a list of all the things her Auntie will do with her:

• Watch Seven Brides for Seven Brothers with her and dance during the barn raising and June Bride.
• Teach her how to color and that Crayola is the best crayons. (I'm sure Leah will show her how to keep all them in their correct spot in the box.)
• Pretend church, boat, train, beauty parlor and whatever else. (But probably not school.)
• Clap the loudest when she learns a new cheer and does a perfect cartwheel.
• Give her lots of candy.
• Paint her nails with pretty pink polish.
• Rock her baby doll when she tells me to.
• Play checkers and Go Fish when her brothers don't want to play with a girl.
• Push her in the swing.
• LOVE HER TO PIECES

its camping not the apocalypse

I have a theory about camping: it should be fun not torture.

We have been watching a lot of survivor shows on Netflicks lately and Dp thinks "mental note, I can boil water in a soda can and eat the stems of water lilies" and I think "why is this man putting himself through all this?" I love being outdoors and in the quiet, but I'm not going to eat wild edibles or use my pee to make condensation I can drink. Its camping, not the apocalypse.

Quick visit this weekend to Hunstville St. Park.

Pretty good park, great trails but way to crowded. I know they gotta make money but, geewiz the sites are close together.

Also, beware the park will sell you moist sappy wood. We had trouble getting a fire going when we first arrived. And even when we got some of the wood dried out we couldn't get a roaring fire to get us warm.

Accomplishments:

• David can really get the tent up fast now. Our first time it took an hour, in the rain and cold. I think it took him 20 min this time.
• We took a pretty nice hike on Saturday, about 5 miles. I could have gone further but we were running out of daylight and I was pretty sure it would take 18 years to get a fire going to cook dinner.
• I hadn't made a foil packet dinner since Camp Fire, but we tried some this time, YUM! We had chicken, red potatoes, onions and bell peppers. So civilized. I tried a baked apple recipe but they were not good. I was expecting apple pie and got warm apple. So we had JUMBO smores instead. Have you seen these Jumbo Jet Puffs? Unreal.
• David has this skill of getting the tent folded just so that it always fits back in the bag. I told him he should work for Coleman. I try rolling sleeping bags and they are 4x the size that will fit in the bag, Dp has room to spare? I guess we all have secret talents.

Why is it always nice to get away even for just 1 night? I feel so recharged and renewed.

On our walk I was thinking how horrible the last few years have been. I struggled with my health, and watched my MeeMaw slip from this world, seen Mary decline and the incredible weight associated with supporting David and Gil, going back to school, losing the GI Bill and my Grandaddy's struggles to name a few. We had so many huge life changes and the difficult kind.

At the beginning of 2012 I was asking (basically begging) God for a break because I am out of steam. But it took most of the year to make it out of the bad stuff. Slowly in the last two months I've felt like the storm is dying down. Not that everything will be perfect, but just less heavy.

Finally, I feel hopeful about the future, even excited about it. That is a true gift.

it is the little things

I know some people have the mental faculties to blog everyday of things they are thankful for. I intended to do all the Thursdays in November and see how far I got?


I made Wheels, our little stray kitty, a house out of a storage bin and foam insulation board. Cats don't always respond to their human's crafty efforts. A lot of times there is a blank stare, huff, and walk away texting their little cat friends and say "i can't believe she thought i was actually going to like eat/play with/sleep in that. lol" (thats my teenager impersonation.)

But! Wheelsie sleeps in her house!!
It is the little things.

I made Dp get down our Christmas decorations already.
I understand some of the outrage at people jumping the Christmas gun. But I can barely get fall decorations out and the next day is January. So I said I'm actually going to get stuff up and down on time this year.
Step 1: Pull everything out 2 weeks before Tgiving
Step 2: Get annoyed at tripping over the boxes sooner
Step 3: Decorate Tgiving weekend!

What is it about a tree that makes me so happy?
It is the little things.

Camping Weekend is coming up.
We don't normally go camping so late in the year. And I'm pretty thankful our sleeping bags are rated for 20 degrees. My favorite part of camping is waking up early in the morning, hopefully you see a couple of deer in the low fog, and you get the first fire of the day going......
My other favorite part of camping is listening to the quiet, just nature, birds and leaves.

It is also our first weekend getaway since January, so I'm pretty excited. David got his hatchet sharpened and pulled out his cold weather gear from the navy... it is safe to say he is jazzed.



Earlier this year I started keeping a gratitude journal.
There is so much good in (most) everyday. But you have to be looking for it.
I'm thankful for all the little things that make life rich and full.
And most importantly I'm thankful for my kitty bears! :)

Flash Fiction: Veterans Day

What You Take

He clasps her hand and pulls her in close
lights from the deck of the ship glow orange and the normally grey Puget Sound burns in the dark morning
flakes float so quiet and collect on the northwest cedars and firs
they dance a goodbye with Coleman Hawkins
and with one small kiss he turns away
He is deploying today with a full sea bag



Very happy my veteran is now a civilian.
Flash Fiction - Indies Unlimited

Don't make me turn this car around!

*WARNING political post*

I can solve all of our country's political problems.

By the way, I am not a fan of Washington. The bickering, lies, insincerities... Yesterday no matter who won the election I was simply happy it was over.

But yes, I know how to solve the childishness political system. I can't believe no one has thought of it before.
In addition to checks & balances American democracy needs a
National Mom.

This isn't a feminist argument, well maybe a little. But not just any woman could fill the role. Sadly women today have to compete with men to succeed and therefore squashing the very qualities we need more of.

A man may be the head of the family but the force that drives it forward - Mom. Mom gets the kids up, stops the fights, promotes sharing, kisses boo boos, feeds us dinner and then surprise cookies if we finish our broccoli.
Ok, are you with me yet?

Let's let the men keep their big businesses power positions, men are great at making money. But maybe women are just better leaders. Especially when it comes to taking care of men.

There is too much testosterone in government hence the pissing contest... er presidential campaign. (What is it with men & pee? They will pee anywhere. Take a man into the woods for a walk and the first thing he does is giggle when he marks a tree.)

National Mom would

• Care for the little people
• Remind us to be nice to our brother/sister
• Manage the country's grocery bill
• And bake us cookies just because she loves us

I'm in.
And will be nominating Mary Poppins...wait she is British.

well, now Luke my friend

I have a love-hate relationship with my name. The whole dang thing is hard to say and spell and doesn't flow. Growing up I told myself it was cool to have a unique name all whilst desperately trying to get a nickname that wasn't "Anawee."

Sometimes I like to pretend my name has some meaning to make up for the time wasted trying to spell my email address over the phone before I give up and say What's yours and I'll email you. In Washington, someone asked if I was named after The Weight by The Band so I went with it.

Yes, my parents named me after a song. It was either Analee or Crazy Chester.

(I'm not a linear story teller. I don't know how I will get you guys to the place we are going but if you hang in there, we'll get there.
If you are unfamiliar with The Weight, I'm about to make a left hand turn, and it would be alright with me if you followed this link to listen to the excerpt or google The Weight Lyrics to try and unpack the "Crazy Chester" reference.
Once you've taken that mental break come on back and finish the post, I will not promise it will be more interesting than analysing lyrics from a song I wasn't named after but maybe you are bored and need something to read.)

I kinda like the meaning of this song.
How life sometimes hands you more than you bargain for and more than you can swallow. (Amen?) I don't fully subscribe to the cliche "God doesn't give you more than you can handle."
Not too sure God hands out challenges like dealing cards, rather you just happened to come upon a rain storm and maybe it will last just a minute and you won't get soaked and then again maybe it will last an hour and your lawn will get a nice soaking.
Life is pretty random and not always spectacular.

Melissa pointed out I only blogged once in October. (I'll take a second here to mention she hasn't blogged in THREE months, but no judgement here) While looking back on October for a wee re-cap post - October wasn't terrible, nostalgia has already taken hold. But then I read all the posts I started, posted, re-read and took down. Eeesh. I wasn't happy. I was
stressed
sad
overwhelmed
exhausted

I'm not saying I don't want readers/biographical historians to know the truth of this past year. (Truth: it has been doo doo) But this is why I don't like to post the freak-out posts:

in the moment The Weight is too much, but it doesn't linger.

Maybe I only say this because I see a  faint spec of light at the end of the tunnel.
Maybe later today we will be in the middle of more rain
or maybe no rain at all.

wanted: one grand vacation

I am so tired.

The day after the snoball treat I got a cold.

25 days later...

Saturday I gave in and got antibiotics. The cold only lasted 2 weeks but the EVIL earache lingered. Yesterday was the first day in three weeks that I wasn't in terrible pain. Relief.

And apparently Halls is now an encourager.

Oh and by the way David lost his job at the beginning of September. It feels like ages ago. We scrambled, re-wrote his resume and started the dance. Amazingly, he found another job at a bigger (hopefully better) shop and today is his first day.

None of this was dp's fault, just bad luck and bad timing. Which seems to be a theme for us lately. I feel so responsible for making him happy and successful. It is almost like a second job.

Therapist lady has helped me realize that we've never transitioned from Navy couple to civilian couple. I'm still doing everything on my own, all the worry and all the responsibility. It just feels like it is all up to me and David is the wildcard. I "know" he is here for good, but in a way I'm still preparing for him to be gone for a year. We are working on transitioning... you know... five years later. Really hoping dp having a real job will help allow me to let go.
*I chose that picture cause he'll hate that I posted it. Thats how I show my love.

Grandaddy continues to struggle with his health. So much of me is trying not to think about it, because avoiding reality is easier. So instead:

Gordon is a retired Colonel and I'm sure was a very serious man. But I hardly ever saw Grandaddy as anything but silly. He delighted in making people laugh. I love my grandaddy who would round us kids up for dinner with a made up a Come To Dinner song.

His laugh is like this: Ho ho he he he he. I can hear it, can you?

Man it is hard.

I did a little craft project this weekend, cause I needed some fall happiness and of course it had to do with my kitties. I love them!!

I especially love their little hineys. You dont know them so you don't really know that this is the most accurate depiction of their tails. But it is.

All you need to know about Wheels, Rigby and Abbey is right there.

I'll put a pebble in my shoe

Last night conversation:

Dp-  I found it.

Brings me a pebble he has been kicking around for days but couldn't find due to our dark hardwoods and poorly lit hall.

Me- That's a nerd.
Dp- No its a brown speckled rock.
Me- It's a purple nerd.
Dp tries to smash it expecting to see little damage to his "pebble."
Dp- Ok its a nerd.

What you have learned about me today: I have a serious candy addiction. Also, we need to sweep the hall frequently.


*ps- if you have godspell stuck in your head now, join the club. I shall call the pebble dare we will walk together and when we both have had enough I will take it from my shoe singing meet your new road

Snoballs from angels

Yes yes yes yes!
It finally isn't 1000 degrees! Houston almost feels like fall.

On a most glorious day, a sweet-toothed certain someone begs her hubby for a Mam's run. He can't say no (cause he knows what's good for him- sometime- sorta).

There was no line. Not a single person. We had a nice little chat with the snoballer, she sneezed.

Super soft snow with light, unique flavors. I must start and end the season with orchid. It's my favorite flavor- very purpley.  Mixed with soft & sweet nectar and a shot of cream.

Wednesday treat for me!

sunday truths

It is Sunday - and I want to be at church.

The human mind is some kind of complex thing. I wonder how I am. What happened to me to hate tomatoes? And love animals? Is my house cluttered because of some childhood experience?

I don't understand how but I know I would be in a pew right now if I wasn't so dang afraid to leave my house. If the thought of people asking me questions about my life didn't trigger a pervasive armpit sweat like you've never seen. If the shame of not having been to church in a year didn't weigh me down and lifting my feet was too heavy for my heart to bear.

Can God understand anxiety? And shame?

I don't know why, but I still have hope that one day I won't be a complete mess. I'll be able to be myself around real, live, not digital, in the flesh people. I'll be able to be comfortable in my choices, my quirks, all the stuff that makes me different. I'll be able to feel light. And be happy with not being The Same.

But until then, I pray wanting to be at church is enough.
Cause I'm trying God. I am.

when you need a giant vat of mint chip

did you have a terrible week?
i did.

did you have an embarrassing break down on wednesday night, crying and snivelling, getting out words between tight gasps of air -- i *gasp* dont *gasp* want *gasp* to *gasp* go * gasp* to work anymooooore *sniff sniff gasp gasp* ?
i did.

did you eat a giant bowl of mint chip and crack a tiny smile when you found the ENORMOUS chunk in your mint chip? did you eat it out of your brand new ikea bowls that you are pretty sure are intended for rice but you saw them and thought ICE CREAM!?
i did.

tuesday did you have a pre-dinner icecream cone from chickfila and then mint chip for dessert?

i did and stand firm that it isn't overkill.

it has been that kind of week/month/last two years. no one wants to read about ice cream inducing unpleasantness.

So lets talk lip gloss!!!

Remember when I mentioned my lip needs? Yeah, I have Soflips addiction, uh-dict-shun.

(I think dp dreams of being a prepper but I don't give into his insanity. But I will admit, my mind has wondered to a post-apocalyptic scenario and *i swear* my greatest concern is how long will my Softlips stash last, will I have to ration? Just once in the morning and once at night or if it was terrible once at night, and without ac would they melt and then I would use a stick to dig out the lip protectant goodness? This isn't just blog wit, I've seriously gone down that road.)

At all times I need:

2 softlips at work

1 in the purse

1 by the bed

1 by the desk

+ stash in the drawer

Oh and I have a softlips lip gloss which uh huh, yup, yes it is that amazing. Same light softlips slip from the balm but in a non-sticky no glitter just shiny gloss.

But yes I am a grown woman and since the whole tinted lip balm blog of last year I have vastly expanded my 3 lip color options. Slight update - Sugar by Fresh which was the winner totally melted into a crazy mess, now I have to use a lip brush to even apply- bummer.

Ready? Ok.

Girls/Ladies/Flamboyant Gents

Revlon.Just.Bitten.Kissable.Balm.Stains

That's all you need to know, buy them all. They are kinda everything I ever wanted ever. Wear with gloss or with softlips or mix colors. Buy all of them.

Long lasting color

Easy to apply

Balmy

Amazing

Currently rocking - Honey, Charm, Cherish & Darling

Look at me with the Revlon obsession. Who the heck am I?

Revlon ColorBurst Lip Butters

This is basically a tinted balm - a sheer lip color, my shade Peach Parfait has a teensie bit of glitter which is kinda nice on occasion. I will sometimes wear this on top of a balm stain.

Now for two other random things to mention without mentioning my no good very bad this week/month/last two years....

What is Burts Bees doing in the facial cleansing industry? What did I miss?

Burts Bees Facial Cleansing Wipes

Was loving the Simple face wipes but dang $7 for 25 wipes? So I saw these BB wipes $5 for 30 wipes... I'm not a mathematician but me thinks that is a decent deal.

Haven't broken out at all!

Smell like baby wipes but I dont care.

Fany little closure.

Don't you love tiny doors to open and close? My mom has an xmas ornament - a little chestnut and you open it up and it is a little squirrels house! eeep! And she has a charm that is a house and you can open the roof and see the little bed and table inside!!

Watch it.

http://comediansincarsgettingcoffee.com/

Ok. I feel better.

Happy friday eve!



*I linked up with Kelly's Korner SUYL. Kinda funny cause I never link up and I never talk about make-up. And if anyone actually clicked on my link and read my blog... sorry you wasted 10 minutes reading about Softlips, but check out Comedians in Cars Getting Coffee and it might be worth it.*

rules

i dont really like to follow rules

it isn't an authority issue - i like leaders. heck i'm for anyone who wants to lead other than me cause i dont wanna

but i dont like people telling me how to do things, tell me what to do, when to do it, but dont tell me HOW no no

this has occurred to me over the years i've tried to cram myself into the corporate world

track your productivity here on this spreadsheet in this 11 point font

punctuation and naming conventions... lets all name our files the exact same way

corporate mandated fun - eat the piece of cake because we got a corporate memo

Travel back with me to Algebra

None of that made sense. And one day I was having a matrix conversation with my tutor

Me- So what is the point of this problem?

Louisa - The point?

Me-  The Why?

Louisa - To solve for X

Me- But why? Why am I putting it in a box?

Louisa - To solve for X

Me- :l

Louisa - Ok. Don't think about the why.

But really, why did the Texas Government feel that it was necessary for me to learn that?

Anyways. Corporate America is like that.

i just felt the need to share that.


optional soundtrack for este poste

little tiny inside dancer

i have a little person in my head.

not an imaginary friend - 
i don't really interact with her beyond a mutual awareness that the other exists

she gets to do all the things that i
can't
won't
shouldn't
DO

she tells the jokes that get the big group laugh
comes up with new recipes and actually pulls them off
sings along with the radio
her little house is clean and has living plants in pots on the front porch
she follows her dreams
has a purple streak in her hair
knows a lot of things about a lot of things

today she did a pirouette at work
to the horn solo in For No One
Beatles - Revolver

scrumptious

fresh palmiers
very grape drippy popcicles
sweettarts and pixie sticks
spinkles and jimmies
mounds of pink frosting on a strawberry cupcake

None are as sweet as my Abbey Darling
My sugar bear honey pants

Her kisses are sweet to the max.

well enough is half done

Mary Poppins liked to clean the nursery but I didn't see her cleaning out her bag. In fact, she seemed to have a bit of a hoarding problem.

What the heck didn't she pull out of that carpet bag?! A moose?!

But I wish I had a little MP magic for my purse which can get a little scary. I don't know how it happens, I clean it out and then all the sudden I have

4 necklaces, 2 cell phones, 2 flash drives, pens, candy, a kindle, a birthday drawing for my mommy, a CoStar key, so many lipsticks and balms... and a pistachio.

That was in April.

I tried to find my keys this weekend and I was digging for a whole afternoon. This morning I went to put on my make up and didn't want to stick my hand in.... for fear a monster would bite it off! ACH! (I'm imagining the sand monster in Star Wars)

Don't look directly at it.That's bad right?

But at least there was only ONE necklace and no loose pistachios.

I dare you to look in your purse and tell me there aren't at least three expired coupons

and trash your husband slipped into the front pocket- cause you are the Carrier of Trash?

-- -- -- -- --

In other random, note worthy? things. I'm totally stuck on my green mini day dream. This little painting was looking down on me while I slept at Grammy's house this weekend. I've looked at it maybe 400 times. But this weekend I saw the ADORABLE mint green mini parked up the street. See the little mini parked on the corner? So cute.

AND Monday on the drive home from work, what did we see? A.Mint.Green.Mini. If that isn't a sign....

AND on Tuesday USAA called to tell us they wouldn't total dp's car and are fixing it. So long little mint mini. I was going to name you Monte Pistachio.  

Little things

I like little things. I'm not sure why, maybe because I am little.

Tiny boxes and mini tea cups? Yup
Baby kittens and flying squirrels? Geez
Starbursts cut into itsy bisty cubes? Forget about it!

And when I'm stressed I don't think in complete thoughts making it hard to write a blog. Dp has to listen to 3 stories simultaneously, in bits as they come out. I wish I could plug him into my brain and download all my data into his brain. Talking is a chore sometimes.

Plug yourself in for the following data dump

:: A reader question!
The red "stuff" in the birthday post is a giant gummy bear. Doesn't every one's sister give them huge gummies for birthdays and then use them in place of birthday cake? I thought this was normal behavior.
PS- I also like giant versions of tiny things. That makes sense right?

:: I consider myself quite capable if not darn right good at making eggs. But my daddy is a GENIUS at eggs. Never had any better.

:: I'd like a mint green mini cooper. Dear Santa....

:: It is my Grammy's 81st birthday today! I don't get up to see her as much as I like but I'm glad I could be here on her birthday. And I bought her peaches.

:: I think my mom just named a step stool Tall David.

:: I have no cute stories or pictures of the cats. I thought I'd mention that as proof that I'm not ALL the way off the deep end yet, in case you follow me on instagram and see the 900 pictures of my babies.


That is all the little things.