nine

Twelve years ago I met a boy. I've thought a lot about our month long courtship and what specifically it was that knitted us together to survive long distance and the military and civilian life.

Nothing rings loud. When we drove each other nuts we couldn't seem to get rid of the other. During the everyday we'd talk endlessly on the phone... don't remind my daddy about the $2500 phone bill. oops

Nearly everyone of our major life decisions went like this:
David, what if we...
*got married in three months
*took the Washington command instead of San Diego
*got out of the Navy (this decision was made by email. that's military spousing)
*move to Houston without jobs
*buy a house 5 years earlier than we discussed
*start an olive ranch

David is not only my enormous best friend, lifter of heavy things, reacher of high things, rubber of feet
for whatever reason he has the ability to take my dreams and make them his own
my crazy, spontaneous, irrational, big big dreams

I don't feel like he simply tags along
he genuinely grabs hold of my passion and makes it reality with a commonly spoken sentence in our house

Ok, what do we need to do to make it happen

Maybe we didn't have an epic romance, but it seems to me, nine years later we are an unstoppable partnership. And I love that.

2006  2007 2008 2010 2011 2013

Her First Week

She's been ours for a whole week. Actually, we've cared for her for two years now. But a couple of months ago, I happened to toss a toy mouse on the porch to see if she was interested, not expecting even a raised eyebrow. Instead the skinny black cat played with that mouse. I'd never seen that side of her.

Watching her play, realizing she remembered toys and therefore had a life indoors, and wondering when the last time she actually played... all that broke my heart.  I said "David..." and he said "I know, we've got to bring her in."

Last Thursday Wheels had an appointment with the vet, and was tested for everything under the sun, and is completely healthy. Quite a feat for an outdoor kitty. (This month we've had to get a routine thyroid check for Rigby, put down David's mother's cat, and now Wheels. I think our vet is going to have a very nice summer vacation with the recent influx of cash.)

We are using a slow and steady method with the introduction. Wheels has a base camp in my office and the other cats are slowly introduced. So far it is going very very well. 

I am slightly jealous of dog owners. If you get a new dog, the introduction is a day long process and then they work out the hierarchy of things. There is no hierarchy in cat society. As solitary animals they are sensitive to their territory. Not to say they don't develop friendships and in no way does this make them "mean" or "withholding of their affection." This is just their instinctive animal nature, much like a dog's instinct to chase cars, or dig up your garden. 

Cats are highly adaptive animals, and unlike a dog's desire to please their human, cats adapt on their own terms.

Rigby advanced through all the steps in a day. His first nose to nose, he sniffed and rolled over to show his belly. I think he would like to cuddle with Wheels but she isn't quite ready. So I've been giving him extra snuggles to substitute. Recently, the three of us spend 30 min(ish) daily in a room together.

Abbey is moving slower, but I'm very proud of her. When I got married, Abbey had been with me only 6 months. She was still very untrusting of people other than me. With all the guests in the house, she stayed under the couch the whole weekend and didn't even come out to say goodbye. Seeing where she has come from really makes me amazed at how well she is doing. Essentially she is acting normal other than curiosity around Wheel's base camp.

Wheels is a little champion. I make sure she gets lots of uninterrupted, loooooong naps and as much food as her skinny little belly can hold. We use play therapy to build trust, and I wait for her to fall asleep till I leave. We also try some room swapping, letting our kitties inspect her room while Wheels gets to inspect the rest of the house.

She wouldn't let us pet her face last Thursday, by Saturday she was getting chin scratches!

We aren't quite ready for free access yet. Which is to be expected. I was so so so worried about adding a third. But my kitties still sleep with me and still snuggle and that's all I ever wanted. 

Wheels to be safe and my kitties to love me. All three of them.

she takes my breath away

I lay in a sliver of sunlight with Abbey this morning. Our street is so quiet this time of day, around 10 o'clock. Even the birds have taken a twittering break, except for a dove calling, probably in the backyard.

After a sigh, or grumble, or whatever that noise means to her, she settled on the ottoman, resting her head on the bed.
And I laid my head down too and stared at her.
She opened slits of her eyes to look at me.

We looked at each other.

Her green glass eyes blinking. We don't need words for our language.
She says she is happy like this and could I stay a little longer.
I blink yes, and rest my head on my hands.

When I first found Abbey I wanted her. But would tell myself I didn't. I even said I would never love her like I loved Juni.
How I was wrong.

How much love I have to give when I let myself
in a quiet sun sliver of a moment.

He began a new journey

back in april during one of the coolest and longest Houston springs I can remember

I happened to notice a cocoon in a bed of bamboo in our backyard. It had likely fallen from a near by honeysuckle. He wiggled when I picked him up so I knew he was alive.

He stayed in the safety of his cocoon for just a few days. Howard H. Moth lived in a little tupperware container nestled in a cinder block placed under the eve of the house. (Mom found me a mesh onion bag to secure over his home)

Little Tersa Sphyx hatched in the middle of the night
emerged on a chilly morning

clung to a bamboo stalk in the wind and posed for at least 200 photos
and eventually flew away
beginning a new journey

He is gorgeous.

I was a bit jealous of his transformation, his freedom, his new world and life
leaving it all behind

 *look at that little smile in the center photo!

How strange

How strange it is to be anything at all. —Alice


It is silliness to try and plot the points of your life.  Paths wind and bend and turn back onto themselves.

The last few months have been strange.
I quit my new job
David quit his job
David got a new job
I'm unemployed... by choice, sort of

I quit my job because it just wasn't a good fit, which sounds like an interview answer but is the truth. I could have stayed and been miserable for probably a year and kept a responsible looking resume but really what is the point of that?

During the week I was contemplating quitting David had a networking meeting, liked the guy and stumbled into an interview. I quit and a day later David accepted a new job. We were quiet and just listened and felt like this is where we were being guided.

So, what's been going on since February?
Well when you wait your whole life for something and you get it and it isn't what you wanted and you are so so tired and don't have healthcare and don't know how you will pay for car repairs and sit alone in the house where thoughts aren't drowned out my coworkers and work calls...

Things, feelings, crept up on me I wasn't expecting. I slipped. Found myself dealing, again, with depression and anxiety leading me to an unhealthy place.

Right now the best thing for me is to take care of myself and figure out what I want and practicing a little (LOT) of self-care. So I'm not working. And not listening to my inner voice telling me I am lazy, meditating to the idea of freedom - flying in a light blue sky, the kind with wispy brushed clouds - practicing yoga, slowly pealing back some protective layers and trying to remember what Analee used to want and like and laugh about.


It is a wonder how anything happens. Big things and small things are all equal parts random and fate.

it calms me

Sometimes I get writers anxiety, which is kinda like writers block but narcissistic like, "can I do this? I don't even know what I am doing? What were they thinking letting me do this?"

Nothing new for me. In school, at my previous job, I always would sit down at the computer feeling inadequate and paralyzed by a general ACH! feeling. Would write about 3 words and delete it, repeat at least a dozen times.

And always when I am trying to bury that feeling in obsessive application of Softlips or drawing a pyramid doodles.

But what always gets my mind working again is this blog. Telling you a funny story about a cat or embarrassing David with an interpretation of a previous conversation. It maybe small, but it always works. After I click publish, I settle down and get to work.

Anne Lamott writes in Bird by Bird that she conquers this feeling (yay it is normal!) by keeping a 1 inch picture frame on her desk. Her challenge is just to write enough to fill that tiny space. That small box is less overwhelming that the expanse of a blank document.

Blogging is my 1 inch picture frame.
I just need to fill a tiny bit of this space to unlock what lies trapped under heavy chest, racing thoughts and sticky insecurity.




I also listen to Tibetan bowls, which strangely fills the quiet. Next time I'll share my I'm-on-a-deadline playlist which is very heavily weighted with a Batman soundtrack. It works. Really.

Out of the Cube: One Month

I spent the last five and a half years driving to the same building downtown and in the same cube, well when they finally gave me one. I remember being so excited I actually had a cube, and drawers and a bulletin board to pin pictures of Catasauruses and doodles.

But corporate life was hard for me. I can follow instructions, but not very good at following rules.
Last night I told David that I followed a recipe and then qualified that with well, not all the way but mostly, kind of.

That's me in to the letter. Great employee, hard working and willing to go the extra mile but resentful of rules for the sake of documented I-told-you-so's.

The initial plan in September was to become a freelance copywriter. To be really really out of the corporate world. I still might be headed there, or not. I like the idea of the career un-path. No lines, no ladders, just whatever opportunities come my way.


So I've been a journalist for one month. And I have lots of thoughts.

1. It is a lot harder than I thought to explain to people what I do. Journalist? Yes, a reporter. Like in the media? Yes. I write news stories. But just about real estate? Yes. And you write for the internets? Yes, like a millennial Kermit the Frog.

2. I am constantly battling self confidence and fear of incompetence. It is terrifying putting myself out there for the world to judge. I feel like a tiny baby reporter taking my first steps in a marathon race. Deer.in.headlights.

3. Which brings me to my next observation, this could not happen without the most incredible teacher in the world, my Daddy. Daddy what would you ask this person in an interview? Can I say this? Can I put a quote as the first sentence? But how do you know _____?

Where David spends hours trying to build me up and tell me I can do it, all daddy has to say is

"Stop thinking so much. Just get some words on the page and move on."

Just a month writing and I have more professional respect than ever for his work, his talent, his presence in this industry. He hasn't been with the Chronicle for 10 years and I field at least 3 or 4 emails a week asking if I know Ralph. Legend.

It makes me proud to add my maiden name in my byline. It is meant to be there.

Acknowledge It

Geez it is well into 2014 so I probably should acknowledge it at some point.

2013 Last year I took a post it and wrote the following:

Stay Grateful 
Change 
Just DO IT 

I couldn't have picked more encouraging words to guide my year. This is my fifth year looking back at each year and they are one of my favorite posts to reread over and over. I learn so much about myself.

1  accomplishments big and small
    *celebrated my 30th birthday
    *started drinking coffee
    *got a promotion
    *quit my job
    *got a new job

2  pleasure
    *Brynn Leigh Beth ♥ 
    *camping, hiking, breathing fresh air
    *vacationing with my parents
    *Kazoozles
    *Abbey's sweet kisses and tiny stampy feet
    *Rigby's wet chin and new nickname "Boogie"
    *Our friend Wheels
    *listening to B&D tell me stories
    *garden FINALLY survived
    *garlic press - where has this been all my life?
    *restaurant obsession of the year: Zoe's
    *candy obsession: RS Iddy Biddy Bunnies/Santas
    *road trips with Dp
    *youtube vlogs on the ipad

3  hurts and disappointments
    *Epicly Evil Earache
    *professional struggles
    *surrounded by illness and pain
    *giving up Montana
    *losing sight of the important
    *too busy to enjoy life, to nurture myself
 
4  forgiveness
    This might be the first year in a long time I don't feel guilty about not being enough for my family and
    friends. I am what I am.

5 thankful
   I have so much good in my life. a safe home, a family that takes care of me, friends that put up with me, a
   mind that allows me to amazing things that surprise even me.

Last thoughts
I wanted 2013 to be more than the last 4 four years. I set grand goals, and pretty much set myself up for failure. Because I was trying to impress something outside myself. When I stopped listening to what everyone out there said I should be my path became easier to spot.

Those three words on a paper kept me grounded, inspired and willing to ditch the fear and move on. Who wants to be trapped in the muck? I just want to keep going, see more sunsets, crunch leaves and gravel under my feet, find my voice and write, take care of myself and my family. I'm not quite done.



 Looking back:  2009  2010  2011  2012

Officemates

I work from home but occasionally get visitors.

To DP- I have a new catsistant.
Dp to Me- Is she clawlified?

Spray

When I used to wash dishes as a small child, standing on a kitchen chair, pretending I was making soups and stews with soapy water, I wished for a faucet sprayer hose.

I don't know where this obsession came from, but I wanted one. I wanted to spray the sides of the sink and spray my sister in the face. Oh how fun it would be to rinse a pan with a playful spray of water and not a boring stream straight from the faucet.

This morning after rinsing loose tea leaves from the sides of my sink with a cupped hand of water,
I stopped and grabbed my faucet sprayer.
It actually was fun.



ps- our second house in Houston had a sink sprayer. it wasn't fun at age 13 anymore. And neither was pretending to cook with dish water. Although now when I have to wash sink dishes I do pretend I'm Cinderella trapped by an evil ogre. 

pps- what was my mom thinking letting me wash dishes so young? i've seen my nephews was their hands, they are anything but thorough. Did mom come back behind me and rewash the dishes? Did we eat off of 6 year old washed dishes, and if we did - gross.

Paying Attention

Eleven years ago I had a prophetic dream.

One has to have a great deal of courage to announce that but there it is. Ask me sometime about that very real experience. I didn't place enough faith in what I experienced, but in September when I had another dream (not prophetic but still profound) I knew to listen.

MeeMaw visited me at work and told me she needed to talk to be. So we walked to the elevator and chatted about the future and pleasant things. A group crowded into the elevator and before the doors closed she took my hand and said "It may drop but it isn't going to fall." Half way down the building the elevator started to drop, I was the only one to notice even though we were falling so fast my feet left the floor. MeeMaw held my hand tighter and pulled me back down and the drop slowed and then stopped and we all exited the elevator.

I woke up in September crying, not sadness but pure emotion, a wellspring. I knew I had to quit my job and last week I put in my two weeks. All the logical brained people in the world are probably getting a little uncomfortable at this point. Maybe if I called it faith or fate or some other acceptable word it would seem less impulsive. (I once had a therapist tell me I was impulsive after my intake exam. And? Never considered it a negative to be willing to take an inspired risk)

After making my mind up that I was going to leave, and then changing my mind, and then deciding No, I need to do this, only to have my confidence wane and several more months of back and forth I was offered a job.

Providence or promise. I will start the new year as a writer, a journalist.
All because I was paying attention and learned to listen.

The Falls

The last couple of months have been long and confusing. And I was about to max out my vacation time (not be able to accrue) so it was a forced minication.

We intended to leave early Saturday morning, but I'd been fighting an ear infection for weeks and I was miserable and we left after noon. The car ride up to Marble Falls felt like an 8 hr drive and as difficult as it was for me, I don't think Dp had any fun watching me writhe. *Our plan was to camp but there was still a burn ban in effect and no, just no.*

When we got to the hotel I immediately crawled into bed. Felt safe cause at least I wasn't in the car. I pulled on the blankets to get nice and cozy and physics happened and my phone flew at my face and hit me in the eye and I spent the rest of the trip with a swollen eye. (I don't bruise and it is annoying. I can bump into the corner of a table, fall to the ground and think that is definitely going to bruise. Nothing. But sometimes the wind will blow and it will give me a bruise on my knee. ?? Basically if I get hurt something terrible said body part refuses to bruise. So no, I didn't have a black eye.  But the next time Dp kisses my forehead, watch out.)

Anyway after a thrilling night of pouting, ice packs, Alaska State Troopers, and an upset tummy I decided I was never going anywhere ever again. I was going to live in a bubble, become Howardette Hughes. But in the morning we went hiking because I can't tell Dp no. Nothing is worse than a grumpy David. Not even hiking with an ear infection (later I found out it was two infections, in the same ear).

Surprise! It was pouring rain when we got to Perdenales Falls SP. Most of the park is heavily wooded so it was still a pleasant hike. Changing leaves, water falls, lots of deer and birds.

Back at the hotel I took a warm shower and drank hot cocoa. "We" rested up a little, I think Dp played on the iPad. And we went to Ginger and Spice for the best yellow curry I've ever had. I know it sounds wrong, Thai food in Marble Falls, but it is just right.

The next morning we tried to go to an olive ranch but the owner was very rude, told us we were fools for looking into olives. I hate dream killers. Just let people dream.
So we went to New Braunfels instead. Of course we went to the Gristmill and Nalgein's, cause you have to.
We were trying to burn sometime before coming back to Houston so we'd miss rush hour traffic. We went down to the Comal river, rolled up our pants and stuck our feet in the water. I think this was my favorite part of the weekend. We didn't talk and didn't have to. We just sat. Watched leaves float downstream, and skipped rocks.

Walking back to the car I was so relaxed like leaving a spa relaxed.
We drove back into Houston in the rain
eating gingerbread men fresh from the oven.

presents

On Sunday we received our very first present from Wheels.

Sadly, it was a mutilated lizard. But the thought was very sweet. So I picked her up and gave her a squeeze and made a big fuss. We are one step closer to calling Wheels one of the family. Right now I'd say we are very good neighbors, that like to exchange dead things.


Not to be outdone, Abbey brought us two presents last night: Green Pishy and Fat Bunny. And Rigby found a spider.

pool of lovely, pale colors

i woke up recently tangled in sheets missing a pillow the room lay in a weird green light seeping in through the tops of the curtains i couldnt recognize myself or this room or my crooked teeth inside my mouth, have you ever thought about how weird it is to be you and how strange it would be to be someone else looking at you that isn't you anymore? but everyday despite momentary panic i wash this strangers body in the shower put on a strangers clothes and step into an office. i pretend i am a lot of things, impress the brokers with fake knowledge and befriend the young kids with my feigned youth, speak obligatory robot to corporate muckity mucks. i also squeeze my eyes tight and see pale strobing lights but never any shapes and certainly not any neverlands.

when i start to write raise a finger at a blinking cursor the only words formed are a confession i am not myself today i am not any person today

its a monday

That project I was working on, it was a job. A good job at my company.

And I was going to announce on the blog this week, that I beat out tough competition and got this job and finally I will be doing something I enjoy, that I'm good at and I just can't keep the excitement in any longer....

but I didn't get it.

And kept smiling like fool and saying "well thank you for the opportunity" over and over

I've been working a lot, as a test run, with that department and finishing up projects this morning with my almost colleagues was awkward. She knows that I know and I know she knows I know
and we don't say anything

The few people I told about the lengthy interview process, I had to tell them I was second best, and there was someone with more speech writing experience.

I say I'm proud of myself for trying
It is what it is
and finding some joke to hopefully plug up the tears - dont cry at work dont cry at work

I write the email to my parents "Job Update"
and know they are disappointed just as much as me but
I can't quite manage do anything  my parents can brag about

The problem with putting things out on the blog is when stuff falls through you have to explain yourself to the 4 people out there who read this thing
And record the embarrassing failures in your personal history filed under -
Mondays you probably don't want to read about

it's my world and all you people are just livin in it

I might be 30, own my home, work in a high profile industry, manage a house and a family.

But my husband tucks me into bed every night.

Confession #5
While I am getting ready for bed he straightens the sheets, removes all the crummies and specs of poky things that always find their way into the bed, and fluffs my our pillows. (I just realized I'm sounding like a spoiled brat)

Then I fling myself into bed
sometimes a dramatic gone-with-the-wind-flop
sometimes a bouncy hop
sometimes a half asleep shuffle
sometimes I carefully insert myself next to a sleeping cat or two

He pulls the sheet up to my chin and throws my blanket it the air, cracking it like a whip as it slowly floats back down and to lay perfectly on my arms.

If I am feeling silly I will request a "Mummy"
and he tucks in the sheet all around me till I can't move and I am wrapped up tight
I can't help but giggle the whole time, when do you get to have this much fun?

Maybe it is immature and it is probably asking too much of poor Dp who can't possible want to de-crummy the bed all the time.

I hope I always stay silly, and confident in my likes/dislikes, and proud to say I'm 50 and still think the Muppet Movie is hysterical, 60 and I still play Frankenstein with my gummy bears, 80 and love to swing.

I hope David tucks me in every night and I can say at the age of 90 "Can you mummy me?"

crumbs in the bottom of the july bag

July was just the most ridiculous month. Busy and stressful and mixed in with birthdays and anniversaries.

July 3rd was our 8th anniversary - we ate chinese food and saw Much Ado About Nothing at the River Oaks Theater.

July 4th we had mexican food with my dad and went to look at inner loop office developments. all american deal

Sometime in July - our ac went out. probably like everyone else in Houston cause it has been so dang hot. we received recommendations for repairmen from friends and family and everyone we called wouldn't travel to our location. *we live pretty dang centrally located to pretty much everything

We were sweatin' it out and camping in the pink bedroom which happens to have a window unit. We have never turned it on but it works! and kept us coolish at night. But in the mornings despite icey showers I was sweating bullets trying to get ready and had 2 very important meetings at work - my hair wouldn't dry, make up was sliding off my face like icing melting off a cupcake.

• AC was fixed just in time for the SPI trip.
• On a positive note - if you've never seen a cat walk on an air mattress it is hilarious. Rigby liked to jump on it like a trampoline and Abbey was very unsure and took marching steps like she had tape to her feet.

July 21st & then some - I turned 30!

• It was the year of the sentimental gifts. My mom finished my baby book. I've been bratty about this for 20 years probably cause Leah's book was nicer and finished and mine had my name and weight. I've probably looked through it 90 times.
• Daddy gave me a necklace of MeeMaws. (geez I'm almost starting to tear up again) How I always need a reminder to stay focused on the joyful life.
• I completely dropped the ball on the 30 confessions. But last week I had an inspired moment and wrote down all the ideas I had, scheduled the order and nothing is going to stop me from getting these confessions on this blog.

All of July - This current project at work has been exciting and stressful and a lot of work and taken up a lot of headspace. Even on our vacation in SPI I was consumed with planning and strategizing.  I'm hoping this will take a backseat in August because I need some relaxing time.

Cat-update

• Abbey has been on the light food for about a month and feeding the cats two different foods has really worked out well. Abbey seems fuller on her food and Rigby seems uninterested (or unaware?) in her food.
• We've started feeding Wheels canned food. We are nuts. I think she has some dental issues because she woofs down that wet food and only nibbles the hard food. To make a box of box food last longer we mix her hard food with some water so it is a little bit mushy. All this for a stray cat. :/
• Aren't you glad I included this cat update? I'm sure in 10 years I will be interested in the eating patterns of our felines.

the SPI post

I've been working on a special project at work, planning birthday surprises, sleeping in an un-air conditioned house, and feeling frazzled for pretty much all of June and July.


Over the weekend we took a little break and went to South Padre Island with my folks. I forced Dp to pack my dslr (there was a little argument about it too) and we took it out once on the last day.... woops.

We flew out Friday morning and the flight was 42 min long, which is perfect for me since I am a terrible flyer. It isn't a true fear of flying, more like a claustrophobic thing and my ears always bother me. I'm impressed with people who can read on the plane, I just can't ever get comfortable enough to focus on anything other than the incredible lack of fresh air.

Freddy Fender
I'd never heard of him. A friend of the family supposedly had some epic jam sessions with him at some point in unrecorded history. So we stopped at the Freddy Fender Museum in San Benito. You know when you are aware that you are living a future memory? That's the only to describe it.


SPI
We saw fireworks, and walked on the beach on pink sand stained by a setting sun, swam in the morning before the hot rays, tried to read but really just sat on the balcony and talked about the future and dreams, ate guacamole and carrots, didn't get ice cream once, took long heavy naps, avoided sun burns, stress-free and relaxed.








Palo Alto Battlefield
We had some time before our flight home and stopped into the Palo Alto Battlefield NP. I've been to lots of historic battlegrounds and old forts in my life, most are eye-roll inducing - hot - miserable places. This was worth the trip out there. Museum was interactive and very well done. There was a short film about the battle and we watched it in spanish and tested analee on her translation skills. It is gorgeous flat terrain, scrubby brush, flowy grasses, breezy but hot. Reminded me of Lonesome Dove and David even mentioned how he thought we could grow olives down there. (That's our scale of could we live somewhere, Can we grow olives here?)



SPI Haiku Summary
Cool ocean water
a calm cradle for the soul
unwinds tangled mind

MidJuly

I had a realisation this morning
I have to reveal 26 confessions in 5 days?!
Wait I'm turning 30 in 5 days?!
And realising I didn't plan this well.
And realised I still haven't done our anniversary post or worked on a special creative project I swore I'd finish in July or vacuumed the pink bedroom that was supposed to be done at the end of June.

Confession No 5
I am a great employee. I do my job well, I always look for ways to improve the products my team produces, and I actually care about my work.
But when it comes to myself... I have horrible follow through. I can't finish a single, flippin thing that I would consider to be "more important than work".

You know all those things that make you who you are, that enrich and nourish you? I think that is called taking care of yourself. Those are the things I suck terribly at.

But getting a report turned in on time, producing more than any team has ever produced in the history of research productionary producing, and stressing about taking 4 hours off to go to the dentist. I'm amazing at that.

Keeping my house tidy
Fresh meals on the table
Finding new music and concerts and art exhibits and local theater
Caring for my body
Drawing in my art journal
Pleasure reading and writing
Time alone to just sit and be quiet

I haven't done any of these things in ages.

Friday Confession

I have a lot to say about one of our best anniversaries ever, a relaxing July 4th, family visit and staycation weekend. But it has been a heavy writing week at work and my little brain has been more focused on the energy industry and office occupancy to even manage one coherent sentence about my life.

Random Friday Confession!
I really love my sister. Pretty much I have the best family ever, really, ever. But I am horrible about calling her... it is one of my flaws.

We both love texting cause there aren't screaming kids or husband distractions just me and sister talking.

What do two sisters talk about?
Here is the confession - We talk more than any other time of the year during Big Brother season. It's kind of our thing.

Last night I was getting ready for bed and talking strategy with my Big Sister. Maybe one day they will do a siblings season again and we can go in there and kick butt. :)